Nov 13, 2016

Behind again.

I already missed a few days of blogging but it's really ok. Between the election and things happening at school, last week really took the wind out of my sails. I've been taking the weekend to pull everything back together and get on track again. I do have a lot to write but the energy to do it has been my biggest challenge so far. This quarter and all of the emotions has taken a lot of energy to deal with. Perseverance is really getting me through my days and it's running a little thin. Anyway, I have a lot to do to get me ready for the week and should use the time I have to do it.
Let's go.





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Nov 8, 2016

Midterms....

Instead of getting wrapped up in the election, I'm getting wrapped in radiology.
Let's see how well that works!



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Nov 6, 2016

Already behind

I missed a day of blogging due to a really awful bout of sickness yesterday. I'm pretty sure I have a sinus infection but I am on the upswing. My face hurt so badly I couldn't think straight which was terrible and thankfully today I can at least function. I have quite the week ahead of me so it's time to tuck into bed and hope I don't hack a lung up.
This has really not been my couple of months.






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Nov 4, 2016

Short and sweet



I'm sick. We're watching The Crown and putzing around while trying to wind down from a trying week. We're laughing and teasing and wondering why the dogs are being so monstrous. There is tea drinking and snuggling and wondering when we are going to catch a break in our schedules besides these precious few hours at night. The grind is getting to us both but at least we're in it together.



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Nov 3, 2016

Oh the things I would say







I love the prompt for today.

If you could be completely honest with no regrets, what would you say and to whom? 

I've never felt like I was in a place where I could be totally honest with people. I find ways to be tactful and diplomatic when possible but the consequence of those things is that you lose a little bit of the truthfulness of why you are saying what you are. In order to play the game though, I'm going to change the rules of the prompt. I get to say whatever i want, you just don't know who I'm saying it to.

Let's be honest, for what I'm going to say it may be best.

  • I don't care about your need to offload your emotions onto people who need you to be leader. You emotions have no place in your work environment unless they provide forward progress for those you are suppose to be leading. If you can't handle the stress of what you're doing, find something else to do. Anything to not let people get caught in the crossfires of you unprofessional behavior.
  • Everything is going to be fine. One way or another we will all end up on the same page and it's ok to get a little behind. We will be fine. 
  • I don't have the emotional capacity to spend time with you anymore and it would be much easier if you actually did something wrong. 
  • You have no skills do deal with stress. What's even worse is that you find ways to add to your stress which are mostly totally avoidable. 
  • At some point, you have to be ok with people bossing you around. It takes more than just being good at leading to be a good leader. The older you get the less willing you are to take direction about something if you would've done that something different. It makes you less fun to be around because people are starting to wonder when they'll say something to set you off.
  • I miss you everyday.
  • The happiness your progress in life brings me is immeasurable. 
  • I'm learning to see your apologies in actions. It's hard for me and you aren't perfect either but it's getting better. 
  •  Acting silly/playful isn't something that works for you. It's a trait that has developed in the last few years and it doesn't work. You can pull off light hearted, fun, enjoyable, and pleasant but something about silly or playful fits you like a pair of jeans fit after gaining 5 pounds.
  • You are important in my life but being around you is exhausting. Thinking about being around you is exhausting. It is just exhausting. 
  • The end is in sight. We just need to play the game and jump through the hoops and we'll be right on our way. It'll be here before we know it. 
  • You're doing the very best you can and it is more than enough. 
That's all I have for now. I see the value in doing this more often because man do I feel lighter. One day I may even work up the nerve to say these to some peoples' faces but right now, this is enough.
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